My 8-year-old daughter has been involved in a great day camp this summer. Most of the other kids are even allowed to use school buses to go there. Not Katie. She has a seizure disorder, and no nurse could be found to help us out this summer and ride with her. So, each and every day, I drive the 11.4 mile round trip twice a day to provide her transportation. The experience is worth it. The road I have to take to get there is just plain irritating.
Don't get me wrong, the road is in pretty good shape, especially compared to the ones I used to drive in New Orleans! It isn't exactly the road at all. It's the other drivers. This road, in my neck of the woods called New Middletown, has a speed limit of 30 miles per hour, and is mostly one lane in both directions. Somewhere along the way, I think someone must have decided that speed limits in New York are more like speed "guidelines". And I have to give them this: in all my travels on this stretch of road, I have NEVER seen anyone pulled over for speeding. But does that really make it okay?
I am NOT a perfect driver. I occasionally do the wrong thing. Like my mother before me, I tend to have a lead foot. Consequently, I am more cautious about things like speed when I drive. And all of you that think it's okay to crawl up my tail pipe? I will probably go even slower. I figure it this way: if you hit me from that close behind me, I want to pick which speed you are going, not let you do it . . .
So, what does this all have to do with anything? Today, as I was (as usual) going the speed limit along this road, the woman behind me decided that 35 was not fast enough, that not only would she crawl up my tail pipe (which made me slow back down to 30), she then proceeded to pass me in the turn lane and turn and give me that dirty look like I was the one breaking the law. Of course, in pulling up to the next stop light, there she was right in front me. Phew. What a relief that she reached that same stop light 10 seconds faster than me.
It really made me stop and think about my Christian walk. Just because no friendly Clarkstown police officer is there to pull her over for doing the wrong thing - did she really think that was okay? As a Christian do I let those "polite" sins go in my life because no one knows I did them? Do I really think THAT is okay? Do you?
I mean, I haven't murdered anyone (well, besides that whole wishing them dead possibly), nor have I ever committed adultery (but have I ever looked at someone and thought about it?), nor have I stolen anything (except maybe the occasional office supply?). Doesn't that make me okay? Wow. It sure can be a slippery slope. I can certainly attest to the fact that I have caught myself going too fast in a slower zone, even if it wasn't this week, last week or 3 months ago. In case you hadn't noticed, lady in the red SUV, that is breaking the law.
I suppose all of that ranting and raving was about saying this: Jesus calls us to a higher standard. Ouch. Now, according to the Scriptures, not just breaking the law is a sin, but considering it, or wishing someone harm is also sinful. How often do we go there, and feel absolutely no remorse? I once heard someone ask the question that if being a Christian became illegal, would anyone be able to accuse you in a court of law? Would you be acquitted or indicted? Our life is more than about breaking or keeping rules, certainly. Certainly there are many things to be concerned about, but just for today, perhaps our personal integrity deserves an honest review.
And lady in the red SUV - you are forgiven. Not just because I vented my spleen, nor because I am better than you, but because being bitter towards you comes at a great cost. If Jesus can die for me, then I should be able to forgive you too, even if no one even knows I am angry at you. It's not total personal integrity, but it's where I can start right now.
Wednesday, August 7, 2013
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Lessons from my rose bushes
I have a confession to make. I am not the greatest gardner in the world. As a matter of fact, I tend to let my rose bushes get really messy before deciding to do anything with them at all, including feeding them! I will let them grow over the sidewalk WAAY too far before doing anything to trim them back, and the bottoms of them are very woody.
This week, I gathered my supplies and decided it was time to do something about our "growing" problem. The back door is our favorite way to enter the house, and quite frankly, those bushes have some wicked thorns, sometimes forcing us off the sidewalk into the grass. The other thing I have noticed is that after I prune them they tend to look fabulous, grow better, and become overall healthier.
As I was pruning, though, I found God bringing several things to my mind that correlate to the church. Richard and I often find ourselves in situations where God is about to do something great in the church we are serving. Our move to New York seems to be just such an opportunity. We are in a rebuilding phase, and that is fabulous. However, it also comes with birthing pains. Four distinct things came to mind as I was pruning that made me think of God growing a church through such an experience.
1. When I am pruning these bushes, some branches have to come all the way off. Even back to the ground sometimes. Let's face it. Even when they are green, sometimes they are just dead branches, and if I leave them on the bush, they are wasting my resources. They continue to draw water, sun and feed that is meant for the healthier part of the bush. Could I leave them in place? Maybe, but I can also choose to remove them entirely, therefore using the resources toward the healthier parts of the plant instead of the dead ones, maybe even to the point of removing the healthy branch's opportunities to grow.
I think God does that sometimes with people in the church. Don't get me wrong, I am not meaning to say that God "takes people out," so to speak. He may call them on to another church that will breathe new life into their faith, and make them a productive part of that place to His glory. But, He will remove them in His good time. Consider this: if you aren't a part of the solution, then you are a part of the problem. Are you working in your own church in the way that you should, adding to the overall good health of your church? If not, why not? Are you using up resources intended for growth for others in your sort of "on the shelf" blessed assurance? There is not retirement plan here. Get to work!
2. Some branches have the tiniest bit of growth. When I say, "the tiniest bit", I am speaking of even just a red place in the crook of a branch that might eventually be a stem for a new rose. In some places, it is almost too little to see, but I look hard for those spots, because the ultimate goal is to breed new blooms, maybe even in the most unexpected place. God does this in the church as well. Although that branch may look dead, if that tiny bit of growth will produce something beautiful, I am willing to put the resources of the bush there for a time, hoping that will promote that healthy growth. In our own lives, sometimes this means being very patient with one another, waiting for God to bring the growth. But rest assured, there is something beautiful coming there. If not, the branch will be pruned in His good time.
3. Thorns are painful. At this very moment, as I sit and type this, there is a thorn in my left hand. Literally. Even though I use gloves when I prune. My bush uses them as protection, or so I am told. Since I consider myself the "friend" of my bush, the one that cares for it (even only occasionally), sometimes I think its defenses are a bit too high! Some of those branches are wickedly protected. People act the same way on occasion. My natural instinct is to protect myself heavily, and I am betting you have that same inclination. Sometimes, in that self centered desire, I throw out defenses that make people uncomfortable. I don't intend to inflict damage, but the old adage holds true that hurting people hurt people. Even unintentionally. In time, at least in life (though not in rose bushes!), those defenses will come down. I pray that you are mature enough to understand, and that I will be mature enough to understand in the case of others that those hurts were unintentional, and grow past them. If not, one of us might have to be pruned back, or cut off altogether, and that is a difficult situation for everyone.
4. Pruning can be awful, but the results are fantastic. After finishing my job on the bushes, they look pretty thin, but already, in just 2 days, I can see new growth abounding on them. I have already had one beautiful blooming of roses, and it looks as though, through the pruning and feeding, that I will have another in this season. In the church, we tend to look back at the "glory days", when we had 750 in attendance and all these things going on, and lament those, instead of looking for God to produce another "blooming". There are cycles in life. Sometimes we are on the upswing in a cycle, but if we don't cycle down, then back up again, we will stunt our own growth. In church lingo, we say these churches are in decline. What we really mean is that the church is on life support, and short of a few people doing a lot of work, the growth will never be evident again, and the church will cease to exist, or have to reinvent itself through a lot of hard work. It's worth it, though, to do the work, let God do the pruning, then enjoy the new "blooming".
The Bible says that if we do the work, God will bring the increase. Sometimes the tasks, like being a part of a church going through growing pains can seem enormous. You get discouraged. You feel like the burden of everything rests squarely on you. But we all know that isn't true. Our part is important, but it may be the smallest part of the body. However, if EVERYONE involved does their small part, the body is built up, little by little. Consider your part in the body, then get to work!
This week, I gathered my supplies and decided it was time to do something about our "growing" problem. The back door is our favorite way to enter the house, and quite frankly, those bushes have some wicked thorns, sometimes forcing us off the sidewalk into the grass. The other thing I have noticed is that after I prune them they tend to look fabulous, grow better, and become overall healthier.
As I was pruning, though, I found God bringing several things to my mind that correlate to the church. Richard and I often find ourselves in situations where God is about to do something great in the church we are serving. Our move to New York seems to be just such an opportunity. We are in a rebuilding phase, and that is fabulous. However, it also comes with birthing pains. Four distinct things came to mind as I was pruning that made me think of God growing a church through such an experience.
1. When I am pruning these bushes, some branches have to come all the way off. Even back to the ground sometimes. Let's face it. Even when they are green, sometimes they are just dead branches, and if I leave them on the bush, they are wasting my resources. They continue to draw water, sun and feed that is meant for the healthier part of the bush. Could I leave them in place? Maybe, but I can also choose to remove them entirely, therefore using the resources toward the healthier parts of the plant instead of the dead ones, maybe even to the point of removing the healthy branch's opportunities to grow.
I think God does that sometimes with people in the church. Don't get me wrong, I am not meaning to say that God "takes people out," so to speak. He may call them on to another church that will breathe new life into their faith, and make them a productive part of that place to His glory. But, He will remove them in His good time. Consider this: if you aren't a part of the solution, then you are a part of the problem. Are you working in your own church in the way that you should, adding to the overall good health of your church? If not, why not? Are you using up resources intended for growth for others in your sort of "on the shelf" blessed assurance? There is not retirement plan here. Get to work!
2. Some branches have the tiniest bit of growth. When I say, "the tiniest bit", I am speaking of even just a red place in the crook of a branch that might eventually be a stem for a new rose. In some places, it is almost too little to see, but I look hard for those spots, because the ultimate goal is to breed new blooms, maybe even in the most unexpected place. God does this in the church as well. Although that branch may look dead, if that tiny bit of growth will produce something beautiful, I am willing to put the resources of the bush there for a time, hoping that will promote that healthy growth. In our own lives, sometimes this means being very patient with one another, waiting for God to bring the growth. But rest assured, there is something beautiful coming there. If not, the branch will be pruned in His good time.
3. Thorns are painful. At this very moment, as I sit and type this, there is a thorn in my left hand. Literally. Even though I use gloves when I prune. My bush uses them as protection, or so I am told. Since I consider myself the "friend" of my bush, the one that cares for it (even only occasionally), sometimes I think its defenses are a bit too high! Some of those branches are wickedly protected. People act the same way on occasion. My natural instinct is to protect myself heavily, and I am betting you have that same inclination. Sometimes, in that self centered desire, I throw out defenses that make people uncomfortable. I don't intend to inflict damage, but the old adage holds true that hurting people hurt people. Even unintentionally. In time, at least in life (though not in rose bushes!), those defenses will come down. I pray that you are mature enough to understand, and that I will be mature enough to understand in the case of others that those hurts were unintentional, and grow past them. If not, one of us might have to be pruned back, or cut off altogether, and that is a difficult situation for everyone.
4. Pruning can be awful, but the results are fantastic. After finishing my job on the bushes, they look pretty thin, but already, in just 2 days, I can see new growth abounding on them. I have already had one beautiful blooming of roses, and it looks as though, through the pruning and feeding, that I will have another in this season. In the church, we tend to look back at the "glory days", when we had 750 in attendance and all these things going on, and lament those, instead of looking for God to produce another "blooming". There are cycles in life. Sometimes we are on the upswing in a cycle, but if we don't cycle down, then back up again, we will stunt our own growth. In church lingo, we say these churches are in decline. What we really mean is that the church is on life support, and short of a few people doing a lot of work, the growth will never be evident again, and the church will cease to exist, or have to reinvent itself through a lot of hard work. It's worth it, though, to do the work, let God do the pruning, then enjoy the new "blooming".
The Bible says that if we do the work, God will bring the increase. Sometimes the tasks, like being a part of a church going through growing pains can seem enormous. You get discouraged. You feel like the burden of everything rests squarely on you. But we all know that isn't true. Our part is important, but it may be the smallest part of the body. However, if EVERYONE involved does their small part, the body is built up, little by little. Consider your part in the body, then get to work!
Monday, July 22, 2013
Is it a Loss, or a Win?
Last week, I got one of those calls in the early morning. You know the ones - they bring dreadful news that no one wants to hear, no matter what time of day they come. It was my sister, Carol, informing me that our brother (okay, he was my sister's husband, but as long as they'd been married, he was really my brother, you know?) had finally succumbed to heart disease. He was survived by my sister and her 3 children. The youngest child is 23.
For approximately 23 years, he had fought some serious heart problems. Many times, we thought he would go on the heart transplant list, or that there was nothing more they could do. God sustained him through all of those things, even when the going was really hard. He continued to minister in any way he could in the small, rural area where God had placed him. He worked alongside my sister in her ministry as well.
He wasn't perfect. (But who of us is?) He wasn't even a perfect minister, (is that even possible?) but he was a really, really good one. The testimony was clear as we greeted people on that first long day of visitation. It lasted seven hours, and only towards the end of that period did the line start to diminish to the point that it didn't reach all the way to the door. Folks were generous. Unbelievably so. Food, cash, hugs, nothing seemed to be too good for my sister in her time of loss.
But, was it a loss, or a win? I actually laughed as people tried to comfort the family with such words as, "he's at rest now". They didn't know him very well. Instead, I feel pretty sure he was dancing in the streets, hugging on Jesus, and greeting those who had gone before him. In his new body, he didn't have to worry about overdoing it for the first time in 23 years. The idea of him resting was laughable.
The other thing we say is that we are sorry for the loss. Funny, he isn't lost at all. Sure, there will be a Steve-sized hole in our family for a long time. Just like there is a mom-sized hole and a Chuck-sized hole, and a Melody-sized hole. However, it was never more clear that he is not lost to us. Yes, we do wish we could hang on to him a little bit longer. A few more hugs. A couple more times to say, "I love you". The upcoming weddings and new developments in the life of grandchildren. But lost, that he is not.
Please hear my heart here. Knowing what to say in the funeral home is the hardest thing ever. I am not making fun of anyone here. I was comforted by those who came by to share their stories, and as usual, I am sure this was uncomfortable for them, which makes their presence, and their comments, even more special. Instead, I am saying that we do not grieve like the lost. Life is a vapor, according to the Scripture, and none of us are guaranteed to live beyond our next breath. The time for salvation is now. So is the time to get to work.
Have you been putting off something that you need to do for the Kingdom? God can use someone else to do it, but you will certainly miss the blessing of being the one that God called to complete that work. Perhaps you are too busy. If so, my friend, then you are certainly too busy. Lay down all those tasks that mean relatively nothing, and pick up the work to which you were called. I promise, you won't regret it.
For approximately 23 years, he had fought some serious heart problems. Many times, we thought he would go on the heart transplant list, or that there was nothing more they could do. God sustained him through all of those things, even when the going was really hard. He continued to minister in any way he could in the small, rural area where God had placed him. He worked alongside my sister in her ministry as well.
He wasn't perfect. (But who of us is?) He wasn't even a perfect minister, (is that even possible?) but he was a really, really good one. The testimony was clear as we greeted people on that first long day of visitation. It lasted seven hours, and only towards the end of that period did the line start to diminish to the point that it didn't reach all the way to the door. Folks were generous. Unbelievably so. Food, cash, hugs, nothing seemed to be too good for my sister in her time of loss.
But, was it a loss, or a win? I actually laughed as people tried to comfort the family with such words as, "he's at rest now". They didn't know him very well. Instead, I feel pretty sure he was dancing in the streets, hugging on Jesus, and greeting those who had gone before him. In his new body, he didn't have to worry about overdoing it for the first time in 23 years. The idea of him resting was laughable.
The other thing we say is that we are sorry for the loss. Funny, he isn't lost at all. Sure, there will be a Steve-sized hole in our family for a long time. Just like there is a mom-sized hole and a Chuck-sized hole, and a Melody-sized hole. However, it was never more clear that he is not lost to us. Yes, we do wish we could hang on to him a little bit longer. A few more hugs. A couple more times to say, "I love you". The upcoming weddings and new developments in the life of grandchildren. But lost, that he is not.
Please hear my heart here. Knowing what to say in the funeral home is the hardest thing ever. I am not making fun of anyone here. I was comforted by those who came by to share their stories, and as usual, I am sure this was uncomfortable for them, which makes their presence, and their comments, even more special. Instead, I am saying that we do not grieve like the lost. Life is a vapor, according to the Scripture, and none of us are guaranteed to live beyond our next breath. The time for salvation is now. So is the time to get to work.
Have you been putting off something that you need to do for the Kingdom? God can use someone else to do it, but you will certainly miss the blessing of being the one that God called to complete that work. Perhaps you are too busy. If so, my friend, then you are certainly too busy. Lay down all those tasks that mean relatively nothing, and pick up the work to which you were called. I promise, you won't regret it.
Monday, July 1, 2013
And Another One Bites the Dust
Ironically, I used to have a blog on blogspot that I can no longer access called "Life Between the Bridges". It referred to the fact that my husband and I lived in New Orleans, Louisiana, where we literally lived life between several bridges - the Crescent City Connection, the Huey P. Long Bridge, the 4th Street Bridge, the Causeway, etc. You just couldn't go many places without encountering a bridge.
In March, our family moved to New York State - 19 miles outside of New York City. Talk about life between the bridges! Now, we have the George Washington, the Brooklyn, need I say more? There are bridges everywhere. In the new life of the Christian family there are more bridges than ever. The closest one being the Tappan Zee, which will soon undergo a complete restoration.
So, out of necessity, and since I can no longer remember the password for Life Between the Bridges, I decided that Between the Bridges 2 should be born. Don't be misled. The title of this blog does not refer to the fact that yet another blog has bit the dust. As a matter of fact, I would have happily gone on claiming Life Between the Bridges, as it couldn't be more of an apt title than it would certainly be today. Nope. Just because I can't remember that old password doesn't mean a thing, except that the 3 blogs I already created might die a painful death . . .
The title of this particular entry refers instead to the loss of yet another friend to the Ministry of the Gospel. He was a pastor, and I am pretty sure he was a good one. However, add him to the list of living casualties that yet another church has caused to leave the ministry. Let's face it. There just aren't enough of us to pastor every church out there. If there were, things might be different.
You should know, pastoring a church is one of the hardest things anyone can do. Sure, you don't have to go fight a war against Afghanistan. You don't have to wait in an ER for some terribly injured person to come in to repair. Nope, the people you wait for don't necessarily have visible injuries at all. You know they have injuries at all because they are busy injuring you. As I have always been fond of saying, "hurting people hurt people". Not just a saying for Psychologists or well-meaning mothers anymore.
Since we graduated Seminary, we have watched many qualified, carefully trained men drop by the wayside on the road of ministry. They are still out there somewhere. Some sell real estate. Some work in various forms of counseling of teenagers or other hurting people. Some have no idea where their next meal will come from.
This particular friend is moving on faith alone to an area where he hopes to support his family without putting them in a glass house where the whole congregation looks in and tries to tell them how to live life. What will he do? Not sure. His wife will clean houses and businesses while they try to make the rent and feed the family and still pay for a house in a state where they will never live again from 2 churches ago.
So what's the purpose of all this? Here it is: You have the opportunity to make a difference in the life of your pastor. Chances are you will never know just how discouraging his job is until he surprises you one Sunday from the pulpit with his completely unexpected resignation. I have heard horror stories of pastors in line at the funeral of their child when along comes the deacon board to fire them. In the middle of their child's funeral! Is gaining power in a church really that important to people, that they would stand in that line of horror and grief to fire the man that they and God called to that post? Because, as far as I can see, there's more power tripping going on in God's house than the federal government sometimes. Sorry if that offends you, but if it does, examine your heart and make sure you aren't one of "those guys".
Encourage the man that God has called to lead your congregation. Trust his judgment unless you can see that it goes directly against God's Word (not just your opinion or desires), and then handle the situation with grace and care. After all, you have never lived your life perfectly in line with Scripture at all times, right? If you did, you wouldn't need grace, which, by the way, you do. Uphold his family - no matter how they dress, what they do with their hair, how much makeup they wear, or how overweight you determine that they are. It is a hard job, with lots of stress and much prayerful hard work. This work is hard on the family, who sits at home wondering when their husband/father will return and spend time with them, who really should come first anyway. Love on that man until it hurts. Give him the support he needs, and his family, too. You may never know how much it really means.
In March, our family moved to New York State - 19 miles outside of New York City. Talk about life between the bridges! Now, we have the George Washington, the Brooklyn, need I say more? There are bridges everywhere. In the new life of the Christian family there are more bridges than ever. The closest one being the Tappan Zee, which will soon undergo a complete restoration.
So, out of necessity, and since I can no longer remember the password for Life Between the Bridges, I decided that Between the Bridges 2 should be born. Don't be misled. The title of this blog does not refer to the fact that yet another blog has bit the dust. As a matter of fact, I would have happily gone on claiming Life Between the Bridges, as it couldn't be more of an apt title than it would certainly be today. Nope. Just because I can't remember that old password doesn't mean a thing, except that the 3 blogs I already created might die a painful death . . .
The title of this particular entry refers instead to the loss of yet another friend to the Ministry of the Gospel. He was a pastor, and I am pretty sure he was a good one. However, add him to the list of living casualties that yet another church has caused to leave the ministry. Let's face it. There just aren't enough of us to pastor every church out there. If there were, things might be different.
You should know, pastoring a church is one of the hardest things anyone can do. Sure, you don't have to go fight a war against Afghanistan. You don't have to wait in an ER for some terribly injured person to come in to repair. Nope, the people you wait for don't necessarily have visible injuries at all. You know they have injuries at all because they are busy injuring you. As I have always been fond of saying, "hurting people hurt people". Not just a saying for Psychologists or well-meaning mothers anymore.
Since we graduated Seminary, we have watched many qualified, carefully trained men drop by the wayside on the road of ministry. They are still out there somewhere. Some sell real estate. Some work in various forms of counseling of teenagers or other hurting people. Some have no idea where their next meal will come from.
This particular friend is moving on faith alone to an area where he hopes to support his family without putting them in a glass house where the whole congregation looks in and tries to tell them how to live life. What will he do? Not sure. His wife will clean houses and businesses while they try to make the rent and feed the family and still pay for a house in a state where they will never live again from 2 churches ago.
So what's the purpose of all this? Here it is: You have the opportunity to make a difference in the life of your pastor. Chances are you will never know just how discouraging his job is until he surprises you one Sunday from the pulpit with his completely unexpected resignation. I have heard horror stories of pastors in line at the funeral of their child when along comes the deacon board to fire them. In the middle of their child's funeral! Is gaining power in a church really that important to people, that they would stand in that line of horror and grief to fire the man that they and God called to that post? Because, as far as I can see, there's more power tripping going on in God's house than the federal government sometimes. Sorry if that offends you, but if it does, examine your heart and make sure you aren't one of "those guys".
Encourage the man that God has called to lead your congregation. Trust his judgment unless you can see that it goes directly against God's Word (not just your opinion or desires), and then handle the situation with grace and care. After all, you have never lived your life perfectly in line with Scripture at all times, right? If you did, you wouldn't need grace, which, by the way, you do. Uphold his family - no matter how they dress, what they do with their hair, how much makeup they wear, or how overweight you determine that they are. It is a hard job, with lots of stress and much prayerful hard work. This work is hard on the family, who sits at home wondering when their husband/father will return and spend time with them, who really should come first anyway. Love on that man until it hurts. Give him the support he needs, and his family, too. You may never know how much it really means.
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